The AMA Handbook of Business Letters

TE AM FL Y Team-Fly® The AMA Handbook of Business Letters T H I R D E D I T I O N The AMA Handbook of Business Letters T H I R D E D I T I O N J E F F R E Y L . S E G L I N W I T H E D W A R D C O L E M A N American Management Association New York • Atlanta • Brussels • Buenos Aires • Chicago • London • Mexico City San Francisco • Shanghai • Tokyo • Toronto • Washington, D.C. Special discounts on bulk quantities of AMACOM books are available to corporations, professional associations, and other organizations. For details, contact Special Sales Department, AMACOM, a division of American Management Association, 1601 Broadway, New York, NY 10019. Tel.: 212-903-8316 Fax: 212-903-8083 Web site: www.amacombooks.org This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering legal, accounting, or other professional service. If legal advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a competent professional person should be sought. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Seglin, Jeffrey L., 1956– The AMA handbook of business letters / Jeffrey L. Seglin with Edward Coleman.—3rd ed. p. cm. Includes bibliographical references and index. @Bookz ISBN 0-8144-0665-3 1. Commercial correspondence—Handbooks, manuals, etc. 2. Letter writing— Handbooks, manuals, etc. I. Coleman, Edward, 1968– II. Amacom. III. Title. HF5726 .S42 2002 651.7
5—dc21 2001053995
2002 Jeffrey L. Seglin All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. Although this publication is subject to copyright, permission is granted free of charge to photocopy the pages that are required by each user and to print and use pages from the enclosed CD. Only the original purchaser may make photocopies and print and use pages. Under no circumstances is it permitted to sell or distribute on a commercial basis material reproduced from this publication. Except as provided above, this publication may not be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in whole or in part, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior written permission of AMACOM, a division of American Management Association, 1601 Broadway, New York, NY 10019. Printing number 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 This Page Intentionally Left Blank To Nancy This Page Intentionally Left Blank ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● Contents Preface to the Third Edition xiii Preface to the Second Edition xv Preface to the First Edition xvii PART I. The Basics 1 Approaching This Book 1 Approach of This Book 2 CHAPTER 1. Planning the Letter 3 Researching the Facts 4 Analyzing the Subject and Reader 5 Knowing Your Objectives and How to Accomplish Them 6 CHAPTER 2. Components of an Effective Letter 8 Language—Clarity vs. Ambiguity 8 Tone—Personality 11 Focus of Attention—The ‘‘You Attitude’’ 13 Length 15 CHAPTER 3. Structure: The Parts of a Letter 16 Dateline 16 Reference Line 17 Personal or Confidential Note 17 Inside Address 18 Attention Note 20 Salutation 21 Subject Line 22 Paragraphs 22 Continuation Sheets 23 Complimentary Close 24 Signature Block 25 vii viii CONTENTS Identification Line 26 Enclosure and Attachment Notations 27 Distribution Notation 27 Postscript 28 CHAPTER 4. Appearance of the Letter 29 Stationery 29 Various Formats for Letter Writing 31 Full Block 31 Block 33 Semiblock 34 Simplified Letter 34 Official Style 37 Hanging Indented 38 Envelopes 40 Memorandums 40 Faxes 42 E-Mail 42 Notes 45 CHAPTER 5. Grammar 46 Grammar 46 Wrong Pronouns 47 Pronouns and Antecedents 49 Subject and Verb Agreement 49 Dangling Modifiers 51 Split Infinitives 52 Parallel Structure 52 Punctuation 53 Capitalization 53 Spelling 53 Jargon 53 Cliche´s 54 Wordiness 54 CHAPTER 6. Word Processing 56 Word-Processing Software 56 Using Model Letters 57 PART II. The Letters 61 CHAPTER 7. Sales, Marketing, and Public Relations Letters 63 Letters of Introduction (Sample Letters 7.1–7.7) 63 Sales Letters (Sample Letters 7.8–7.22) 72 Letter Accompanying Renewal Notice (Sample Letter 7.23) 91 Letter Announcing a Special Presentation (Sample Letter 7.24) 92 Catalog Letters (Sample Letters 7.25–7.27) 93 Sales Inquiry Response (Sample Letter 7.28) 97 Appointment Requests (Sample Letters 7.29–7.32) 98 ixCONTENTS Letters of Interest (Sample Letters 7.33–7.34) 101 Letter to Difficult-to-See Prospect (Sample Letter 7.35) 104 Letter to Find Decision Maker (Sample Letter 7.36) 105 Letters Confirming Proposals (Sample Letters 7.37–7.39) 106 Follow-Up Letters (Sample Letters 7.40–7.46) 109 Letter to Renew Contact (Sample Letter 7.47) 117 Letter Welcoming New Client (Sample Letter 7.48) 118 Letter Asking for Referral (Sample Letter 7.49) 119 Letter Promoting Special Sale (Sample Letter 7.50) 121 Letter to Wish Existing Customer Holiday Greetings (Sample Letter 7.51) 122 Letter to Acknowledge Anniversary of a Sales Relationship (Sample Letter 7.52) 122 Public Relations Letters (Sample Letters 7.53–7.60) 123 CHAPTER 8. Customer Service Letters 134 Complaint Resolution Letters (Sample Letters 8.1–8.9) 134 Apology Letters (Sample Letters 8.10–8.19) 145 Letter Acknowledging Order (Sample Letter 8.20) 154 Letter to Customer Who Mistakenly Returned Merchandise (Sample Letter 8.21) 155 Letters Correcting Wrong Shipment (Sample Letters 8.22–8.23) 156 Product or Service Information Letters (Sample Letters 8.24–8.29) 158 Thank-You Letters to Customers (Sample Letters 8.30–8.34) 163 Letter to Lapsed Customer (Sample Letter 8.35) 168 Pricing Letters (Sample Letters 8.36–8.38) 169 Change-in-Location Letter (Sample Letter 8.39) 172 Project Status Letters (Sample Letters 8.40–8.43) 174 Product-Handling Letter (Sample Letter 8.44) 178 Letter Explaining Regulatory Impact on Client (Sample Letter 8.45) 179 Subscription Response Letters (Sample Letters 8.46–8.50) 181 Letters to Stockholders (Sample Letters 8.51–8.63) 186 CHAPTER 9. Credit and Collection Letters 201 Letter Requesting Commercial Credit (Sample Letter 9.1) 201 Credit Information Letters (Sample Letters 9.2–9.3) 202 Letters Announcing Credit Policy Change (Sample Letters 9.4–9.5) 204 Returned-Check Letters (Sample Letters 9.6–9.8) 207 Credit Bureau Complaint (Sample Letter 9.9) 210 Credit Reference Letters (Sample Letters 9.10–9.12) 211 Letter Denying Credit (Sample Letter 9.13) 214 Letters Granting Credit (Sample Letters 9.14–9.16) 215 Letter Raising Credit Limit (Sample Letter 9.17) 219 Letter Clearing Disputed Items (Sample Letter 9.18) 219 Stop-Payment Letter (Sample Letter 9.19) 220 Collection Letters (Sample Letters 9.20–9.30) 221 Credit-Suspension Letter (Sample Letter 9.31) 231 Letter Reinstating Credit (Sample Letter 9.32) 232 Letters Accepting Partial Payment (Sample Letters 9.33–9.35) 233 Letter Acknowledging Payment (Sample Letter 9.36) 236 x CONTENTS Letter About Deposit Due (Sample Letter 9.37) 236 Letter to Lender to Renegotiate Payment Terms (Sample Letter 9.38) 237 Letter from Customer About Billing Error (Sample Letter 9.39) 239 CHAPTER 10. Letters to Vendors and Suppliers 240 Letter Placing Order (Sample Letter 10.1) 240 Letter Requesting Free Materials (Sample Letter 10.2) 241 Letter Requesting Distributor’s Name (Sample Letter 10.3) 242 Letter Seeking Information About Product (Sample Letter 10.4) 243 Letter Asking About Quantity Discounts (Sample Letter 10.5) 244 Letters Complimenting Vendors (Sample Letters 10.6–10.7) 245 Letters Clearing Up Billing Errors (Sample Letters 10.8–10.9) 248 Letters Complaining to Vendors (Sample Letters 10.10–10.11) 250 Letter Cancelling Contract (Sample Letter 10.12) 252 Letter Firing Vendor Because of Economic Conditions (Sample Letter 10.13) 253 CHAPTER 11. Personnel Letters 255 Job Interview Request Letters (Sample Letters 11.1–11.5) 255 Letters Accompanying Re´sume´s (Sample Letters 11.6–11.9) 261 Letter Withdrawing Candidacy for a Position (Sample Letter 11.10) 266 Letters Responding to Job Applications (Sample Letters 11.11–11.25) 267 Letters Thanking People Who Recommended Applicants (Sample Letters 11.26–11.27) 282 Job-Offer Letters (Sample Letters 11.28–11.34) 284 Letters Accepting or Rejecting Job Offers (11.35–11.37) 292 Letter Welcoming New Employee (Sample Letter 11.38) 294 Recommendation Letters (Sample Letters 11.39–11.43) 295 Commendation Letters (Sample Letters 11.44–11.51) 300 Review Letter (Sample Letter 11.52) 308 Letters About Job Promotions (Sample Letters 11.53–11.54) 310 New-Employee Announcement Letter (Sample Letter 11.55) 312 Letters Requesting and Refusing Raises (Sample Letters 11.56–11.58) 313 Letter Introducing Outside Person (Sample Letter 11.59) 317 No-Longer-with-Us Letters (Sample Letters 11.60–11.61) 318 Letter of Resignation (Sample Letter 11.62) 320 Retirement Letters (Sample Letters 11.63–11.64) 321 Letter Granting Leave of Absence (Sample Letter 11.65) 323 Letter Demoting Employee Because of Economic Conditions (Sample Letter 11.66) 324 Reprimand (Sample Letter 11.67) 325 Termination Letters (Sample Letters 11.68–11.72) 326 Letter Acknowledging Anniversary Date (Sample Letter 11.73) 333 Letter Announcing Staff Changes (Sample Letter 11.74) 334 Motivation Letter to Employees (Sample Letter 11.75) 335 Farewell Letter to Employee (Sample Letter 11.76) 337 CHAPTER 12. Transmittal Letters 339 Letters Transmitting Payment (Sample Letters 12.1–12.6) 339 Letter Transmitting Contracts (Sample Letter 12.7) 344 TE AM FL Y Team-Fly® xiCONTENTS Letters Transmitting Requested Materials (Sample Letters 12.8–12.9) 345 Letter Transmitting Manuscript (Sample Letter 12.10) 347 Letter Transmitting Manuscript to Reviewer (Sample Letter 12.11) 348 Letter Transmitting Final Invoice (Sample Letter 12.12) 349 CHAPTER 13. Confirmation Letters 351 Letter Confirming Supplier’s Oral Instructions (Sample Letter 13.1) 351 Letter Confirming Prices and Quantity Discounts (Sample Letter 13.2) 352 Letter Confirming Arrangements for Speakers (Sample Letter 13.3) 353 Letter Confirming Appointment (Sample Letter 13.4) 354 Letter Confirming Travel Plans (Sample Letter 13.5) 355 Letter Confirming Telephone Conversation (Sample Letter 13.6) 356 Letter Confirming Telegram (Sample Letter 13.7) 357 Letters Confirming Receipt of Materials (Sample Letters 13.8–13.9) 358 Letter Confirming Assignment (Sample Letter 13.10) 360 CHAPTER 14. Request Letters 362 Letter Requesting Information About Accommodations (Sample Letter 14.1) 362 Letter Requesting Information About Seminars (Sample Letter 14.2) 363 Letter Requesting Assistance (Sample Letter 14.3) 364 Letters Requesting Return of Material (Sample Letters 14.4–14.6) 366 Letter Requesting Material from Speaker (Sample Letter 14.7) 368 Letter Requesting Correction on Charge Account (Sample Letter 14.8) 369 Letter Requesting Reprint of Article (Sample Letter 14.9) 370 Letter Requesting Subscription Cancellation (Sample Letter 14.10) 371 Letter Requesting Catalog (Sample Letter 14.11) 372 Letter Requesting Free Products (Sample Letter 14.12) 373 Letter Requesting Information About a New Product (Sample Letter 14.13) 374 Letter Requesting Pricing Information (Sample Letter 14.14) 375 CHAPTER 15. Replies 377 Letter Acknowledging Order (Sample Letter 15.1) 377 Letter Acknowledging Registration for Conference (Sample Letter 15.2) 378 Remittance Letter (Sample Letter 15.3) 379 Response to Request for Clarification (Sample Letter 15.4) 380 Response to Request for Information About Member of Organization (Sample Letter 15.5) 381 Letter Responding to Request for Information from a Government Agency (Sample Letter 15.6) 383 Letters Responding to Requests for Materials (Sample Letters 15.7–15.9) 384 Letter Replying to a Sales Letter (Sample Letter 15.10) 387 Letter Responding to a Request for a Catalog (Sample Letter 15.11) 388 Letter Responding to a Request for Free Products (Sample Letter 15.12) 389 Letter Responding to Request for Information About a New Product (Sample Letter 15.13) 390 Letters Responding to Requests to Be a Speaker (Sample Letters 15.14–15.15) 391 xii CONTENTS CHAPTER 16. Permissions Letters 393 Letters Seeking Permission to Reprint (Sample Letters 16.1–16.4) 393 Letters Indicating More Information Needed for Permission (Sample Letters 16.5–16.6) 397 Letters Granting Permission (Sample Letters 16.7–16.8) 399 Letters Denying Permission (Sample Letters 16.9–16.10) 401 Cover Letter for Contract (Sample Letter 16.11) 403 Letter Requesting Reversion of Rights (Sample Letter 16.12) 404 CHAPTER 17. Social, Personal, and Miscellaneous Letters 406 Thank-You Letters (Sample Letters 17.1–17.19) 406 Invitations (Sample Letters 17.20–17.25) 423 Responses to Invitations (Sample Letters 17.26–17.34) 429 Letter Expressing Interest in Speaking (Sample Letter 17.35) 437 Letter Reserving Meeting Facility (Sample Letter 17.36) 438 Letter Requesting Membership in a Club (Sample Letter 17.37) 439 Follow-Up Letter to Speech Attendees (Sample Letter 17.38) 441 Letter Expressing Compliments on an Article (Sample Letter 17.39) 442 Birthday Greetings Letter (Sample Letter 17.40) 443 Birth Congratulations Letter (Sample Letter 17.41) 443 Public Service and Fund-Raising Letters (Sample Letters 17.42–17.49) 444 Congratulations-on-New-Position Letters (Sample Letters 17.50–17.51) 455 Letters to Sick Employees, Acquaintances (Sample Letters 17.52–17.54) 457 Condolence Letter (Sample Letter 17.55) 459 Letter Congratulating Someone on a Business Opening (Sample Letter 17.56) 460 Letter Announcing Retirement (Sample Letter 17.57) 461 PART III. Appendixes 463 Appendix I. Words to Watch 465 Appendix II. Punctuation 471 Appendix III. Abbreviations 477 Appendix IV. Grammar Hotline Directory 481 Bibliography 499 Index 503 ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● Preface to the Third Edition The thirteen years that have passed since the publication of the first edition of The AMA Handbook of Business Letters have witnessed the takeoff of the Internet and its use as a vehicle through which to communicate. Billions of e-mail messages pass through American businesses every day. The immediacy with which we now can and expect to communicate with col- leagues, prospective colleagues, and strangers has had a tremendous im- pact on the volume of correspondence we send and receive. We thought it was a good time to update this book to reflect some of the changes in the business environment since the second edition appeared in 1996. The fundamentals of good letter writing remained unchanged since the first edition appeared in 1989. But the choices we have in how we deliver our letters and where we can find information that can be helpful in writing correspondence have grown. We’ve updated this edition with a wider variety of model letters; a careful editing and updating of the entire book to better reflect today’s workplace; and the most current edition of the Grammar Hotline Directory with e-mail and Web site addresses, where you can go to get real-time help with grammar, usage, and writing ques- tions. Ellen Kadin, our editor at AMACOM, has been a terrific advocate for the new edition since the beginning. The advice and detailed punch list given us by Christina McLaughlin, a development editor at AMACOM, was immensely helpful in creating a new edition that was as useful and hands-on as possible for readers, and one that includes more than 365 model letters. Erika Spelman, an associate editor at AMACOM, shep- herded the book through the production process. Tom Williams and Pat Richardson, both of the Writing Center at Tidewater Community College, helped us incorporate the most current edition of the Grammar Hotline xiii xiv PREFACE TO THE THIRD EDITION Directory. Evan Marshall, our agent, helped get the new edition done. We’re also thankful for the contributions of Nancy Seglin, David White- myer, Bethany Whitemyer, Lisa Freiman, and Loren Gary to the project. Edward Coleman, who collaborated on this new edition, came to it with a fresh eye and a critical sense of what worked, what needed fixing, and what needed to be added. The improvements in this new edition are largely due to his efforts. We’re also grateful to readers of previous editions who have sent us letters or e-mails with questions, suggestions, or ideas for this new edition. In an effort to continue to make future editions of the book as useful as possible, we’d like to ask your help once again. If you have ideas for new features or types of letters you’d like to see included in future editions, or if you have observations or questions, send them to: Jeffrey L. Seglin, Au- thor, The AMA Handbook of Business Letters, c/o AMACOM, 1601 Broad- way, New York, NY 10019. Or send e-mail to: jseglin@post.harvard.edu. Jeffrey L. Seglin Boston, Massachusetts September 2001 ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● Preface to the Second Edition It’s remarkable how quickly the years have passed since the publication of the first edition of The AMA Handbook of Business Letters. While much has changed during that time, the basic fundamentals of letter writing have remained the same. Still, we felt it was time that we updated the book with a much wider selection of model letters, updates to reflect today’s work setting, the most current Grammar Hotline Directory, and new information that acknowledges how prevalent a role technology now plays in our daily lives. Mary Glenn, Mike Sivilli, and Robert Griffin at AMACOM contrib- uted greatly to this new edition of the book, which contains more than 320 model letters, as well as new material on writing e-mail and faxes. I’d like to make this book as useful as possible for you. Perhaps the best way to do that is to enlist your help. If you have ideas for new features or types of letters you’d like to see included in future editions, or if you have observations you’d like to make and questions you’d like answered, send them to: Jeffrey L. Seglin, c/o AMACOM, 1601 Broadway, New York, New York 10019. Or e-mail me at: jls@world.std.com. Jeffrey L. Seglin Boston, Massachusetts October 1995 xv ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● Preface to the First Edition Several years ago, I was asked by a financial publisher to write a book on letter writing for bankers. I was puzzled about the need for such a book. Surely bankers who had risen to any level of responsibility knew how to write. Why did they need a book to show them the way? I agreed to write the book. Dozens of generous bankers offered to open their files to me. I was shocked. Not only was there a fundamental lack of basic letter-writing skills, there also was a dearth of bankers who knew basic writing skills. The bankers who helped me with that book kept telling me how unskilled the writers were with whom they dealt. But I was surprised to find the volume of correspondence that was going out with grammatical mistakes, usage problems, unclear statements, and nonstan- dard letter formatting. Several thousand copies and a second edition later, I am more con- vinced than ever that bankers are clamoring for a book that shows them how to write better letters. But I’ve also become convinced that the need doesn’t stop with bankers. Professionals in all walks of the business world are in need of a book that can help them hone their letter-writing skills. The AMA Handbook of Business Letters is designed to answer that need. It will arm professionals with both the skills needed to be good letter writers and more than 270 model letters on which to base their own correspondence. The AMA Hand- book of Business Letters will not just show you how to write be